Another Tooth, Another Dollar

Our tooth fairy is a idiot. When 3 lost his first tooth, he received $1.00. When the second tooth was lost, $2.00. Hopefully by now you get the pattern. Apparently our tooth fairy had “first child” syndrome and had no regard for limitations, the value of a dollar, or how to properly raise a child. In short, our tooth fairy was completely ignorant.

Let’s advance to age 10 ½. Today 3 lost his 11th tooth. That’s ELEVEN, folks. If you followed the pattern mentioned above, that’s $11.00 for losing a damn tooth.

Those of you who know me, I’m hereby warning you that I will look a little strange next time you see me. Tonight I will be pulling out all of my teeth and gently placing them under my pillow. Property taxes are due this week.